Thanx to scubasinger who gave me the idea of using my anguished posts about the squirrel as wrapping paper FOR the squirrel. This was only possible due to the fact that I inadvertently revealed to him that he was getting it (as detailed in a previous post). I underlined and circled those statements which best summarized the torture this project put me through. Then, I cut up the picture of the squirrel that he happened across on my Flickr account that revealed he was getting it. Heh. It looks silly but is very funny. I told him he has to read all marked passages before being allowed to open it. He's already read a few and was laughing the whole time. It has become a running gag about the Flickr business. For example, him to me: "Well, I figured I'd save some money on wrapping paper and just post pictures of all your gifts on my Flickr account. Then you can just click through the album to see what you got."
LOL This story will be sticking around, for sure.
Thanks to everyone who gave me advice, words of encouragement, or much-needed clarification on "gibberish-like" instructions. :-)