Code of Conduct

Hello Men (and Women) Who Knit! For those who don't know, I'm the site admin. *friendlywave*

After reading Terry's post and the comments, I want to make sure everyone feels welcome to reach out to me via email, Facebook, Google Chat, etc. whenever anything like this happens. Harassing other users is not something that will be facilitated or tolerated on this site.

Over the years, many friendships and even a few couples have formed through connections made here. We've also mourned losses together. This is not a place for mean-spirited people. It's very, very easy to misinterpret text on a screen and, to be fair, some folks have thicker skin or are more easily agitated than others. If you complain to me about someone, do not expect them to disappear from the site. I'm all for keeping the peace, but I will always try to do that peacefully.

As we move towards the 10th anniversary of the site, the site will undergo a pretty major and long overdue upgrade in October. There are currently over 5,000 people who have cared enough to sign up for an account and create a user profile. Maybe it's time to codify some of our spirit in to a Code of Conduct for the site to help ensure that you folks feel like you have some recourse to complain or defend yourself. Much of my time on the site is spent in the background, but I'm starting to feel like the Wizard of Oz hiding behind a curtain while all sorts of bad things are happening in the land. This is not how I want things to be, so that's changing, too.

I appreciate all of you and I'm always glad to see old names reappear. You rock!

Now, to anyone out there who thinks it's cool to be a negative force on this site, go away or I'll just keep deleting the subsequent accounts you'll undoubtedly create to somehow get back of me for deleting you in the first place. Pump the brakes, buddy. Women always have and always will be welcome. Don't be lame. It's a knitting site... Seriously. Life's too short.

Crafty Andy's picture

Thank You ! You do make a difference !

BuduR's picture


Thank you Darryl. At the time I got my little love note I never believed that most wanted me gone. I stayed away to keep the peace. I also didn't know that I was not the only person on the receiving end of the venom. If I had known I would have spoken up and if I get another I will.

MWK's Token Estrogen-American

KenInMaine's picture

Thanks Darrell. We appreciate all that you do to keep things running smoothly (including this unfortunately necessary reminder to be considerate and kind to our fellow knitters). I look forward to seeing what the upgrade brings in October!

CLABBERS's picture

Well said, Darrel! Without this site, I would never have continued knitting when I started nearly four years ago. I found YouTube and that was a huge help. But even after watching the tutorials, I found Men Who Knit. I was delighted that there was such a haven for men in the fiber arts. Thank you for making that a reality. Here I have found wonderful tutors, great suggestions, and good friends. Through these friends, I have gone to two retreats and have signed up for a third. I have enjoyed them immensely and have learned a lot. Now I write a knitting blog for a publishing company. I have come a long way and your site has been such a huge part of that progress. Thank you for being the Wizard of our knitting Oz.

I used to be a SYSOP for a site way back at the beginning of the Internet and when chat rooms and newsgroups were first a reality. Sadly, there are those who penetrated those communities who did more harm than good. One of our distasteful tasks was to identify these pariah, warn them, and eliminate them from the community if they didn't modify their behavior. I applaud your suggestion that you will do the same here. I don't think that it is a very big issue here, but there are a couple who might need a good introduction to the discipline wand.

Thanks for all you do for us.


AKQGuy's picture

Thank you for weighing in Darrel, but more importantly, thank you for continuing all the behind the scenes work that allows this site to keep going. You are much appreciated. Even to those more quiet members.

ronhuber's picture

Thanks, Darrel.

Bill's picture

Thank you for keeping us going!
I miss our tiny men's knitting group from which grew "Men Who Knit" I still regard this as the primary Menwhoknit site...although ravelry has a spinoff of it.
We have a warm, generous group of men here, many whom I know personally....and many I wish I could meet!
....and several women who have been with us from the early days...and are treasured!

Darrel's picture

I really miss you guys, too, Bill. The groups at $3 Bill and Cafe Macondo rank high among my fondest memories of San Francisco. Thank you for keeping us going, too, Bill — AKA User #48. If I were Google, you'd be rich! :)

New York Built's picture

One of my favorite sayings in human interaction is, "You can't be the first, but you can be next!" Serves me in many, especially.

I came into Men Who Knit from the cold-shouldered and frosty environments of male-unfriendly knitting communities. Shocking to say, but, "Yes, this is true...for me." I basked in the warmth of welcoming people here, and I am glad to do so in the future. As a newcomer, here only 5 1/2 years, I have always felt welcome...inspired...supported...supportive. As a parent, I know how important this is. I also know how important protecting that safe environment is to me, as well as, for others who feel the same.

Please...I wish to help in any way possible to ensure this community remains a safe and supportive place. Anything else is...well, it ain't Men Who Knit. I avoided other sites for years because of Frontier Justice formats.

The internet can be a dangerous, unhealthy and impersonal place...I hope this space remains free of such qualities in all it's interactions. I can't be the first to support this, but I want to be recognized as the next who does.

How can I help? Thanks, Darrel.

Every person I encounter teaches me more about myself. Without whom not.

SAPBrown's picture

Thanks Darrel for maintaining this site.
It is and has been a wonderful forum. I am proud to be part of such a kind and helpful group. Unfortunately there will always be some folks who thrive on adversity. With the upgrades to come, perhaps a "block" or "ignore" user option could be added. Personally I have no need for it, but like a condom or a handgun, better to have and not need, than need and not have. Fortunately the vast majority of members are supportive, encouraging, helpful, and kind.
Thanks again one and all for the warm and friendly group.


Maybe I can't change the world,
But I will make my corner as pleasant as it can be.

Darrel's picture

This is an excellent idea that I will definitely try to implement! Thanks, Stephen!

Joe-in Wyoming's picture

Thanks, Darrel, for addressing this. I've been Blessed to not get any negative stuff - or if I did, I've forgotten - but it is a bit sad that we have to address this in the first place.

However, it is a great site and I only joined the Ravelry site when convinced to join Ravelry at all...before then I was more than happy with the community I found here. And still am.

Take care.

Books, knitting, cats, fountain pens...Life is Good.

michaelpthompson's picture

Thanks Darrel, for everything you do. I have never seen or experienced anything negative on this site, but I know it can happen and support whatever you need to do to keep it happy.

"All knitting is just one stitch at a time."

Thank You Darryl! For all the work you do to keep this site going.